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Chuck Palahniuk once wrote an essay about the selfsame event that opened with a woman slicked with whipped cream and chocolate pudding deep-throating a cowboy onstage, to an audience whooping like frenzied hyenas.The cultural and historical origins of these events are humble by comparison.It was never a place too crazy to bring kids—in their twenty-five years of operation, he said, they’d never had a single brawl.I should mention that there’s something else that drew me out to Nebraska.Testicle Festivals of all shapes and sizes have been held regularly across the country, from California to Oklahoma to Virginia.Many of them, as you might expect, have a reputation for being the stuff of frat-house nightmares, and I admit that I was a little anxious about what I might find in Nebraska.They may not be the largest or the most prominent ball-eating event, TJ told me over the phone in the weeks leading up to the festival, but they are the most family-friendly.He said that he and his wife, Tifini, who now run the bar and festival together, wanted to make sure their community had a place where anyone could afford to celebrate their fathers.

(No, you can’t call them Rocky Mountain oysters, one testicle enthusiast explained to me—that term is reserved exclusively for pig nuts.) But years ago, the Testicle Festival showcased a menagerie of animal testicles: beef, pork, lamb, and, more unexpectedly, turkey.And this is why I found myself in the arms of TJ Olson on the eve of the twenty-fifth annual Testicle Festival.I flew 1,274 miles to the predominately white, Trump-supporting state of Nebraska, to an event that exudes masculinity in its most stereotypical forms, in order to spend time considering maleness away from the coast, where it sometimes feels as though anything male or male-adjacent carries intrinsically negative connotations.Right before I arrived in Ashland, papers reported that another, more prominent Testicle Festival just two states north in Montana had been shut down for good after two people were struck and killed by a shuttle hijacked by a drunken attendee.That festival, more commonly known by its attendees as “Testy Festy,” had been infamous for its debauchery and violence—fights, fatal crashes, and stabbings were all but expected.

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